Updated: Apr 29
Clear skies get cloudy and bare dark, gloomy, but promising rain clouds. It signals the oncoming of cool, fertilizing showers and sets in with speedy, cool breeze that fills our nostrils with fragrances that even the best brands fail to capture in their little, but expensive cologne bottles. Human mind is not very dissimilar! It's like that clean and clear sky. But, what complicates this clarity is the overpowering of thoughts that needs to be reigned smartly, if not, enter confusion, complication and misery! One of the by-products of this overthinking and over-analytical brain is the simple complication of Matrimony! With explicitness gone, the power over the mind evades the control of the humans.
With the human brain discovering more and more it so seems that the innovations have somewhere lead to so many options that the choice must travel past doors of confusion. More discoveries meant better facilities and easier life. Ironically, the more we've discovered the benefits that could be drawn from Nature, the more distanced we've become from our own selves and our own nature. The journey so far has been more outwards and less inwards. There's clarity about 'how' but in this bargain the 'what' has somewhere been sacrificed. Here, I focus on the current trends in Matrimony. People know 'how' to look for a suitable partner but it so seems that people have given a backseat to 'what' they themselves want. Result: insularity from marriage as an institution, disbelief in communion, late marriages, forced marriages, early separations, more disparity between what they want and what they ask for.
Marriage isn't a new institution that society has happened to establish a decade ago. It's Ancient. It's New. It's our past, present and future. It's certainly not cool to blame it on an institution like Marriage for our own fickle-mindedness and uncertainty about ourselves! To give my argument more emphasis, take the example of the movie, "Runaway Bride", a movie that showcases the reasons behind a person escaping the predicament called marriage was because of the unawareness about certain facts like: "Who am I?" and "What do I want?".
It’s Time. We've found you a life-partner. Our family has known their family since generations. You must be thankful that the Lord Almighty has found you such a good match!...
-Yes, we've heard our elders share their stories of "How I met your Mother? or How I met your Father?", that had begun with such words. Somewhere deep down, even after decades of being united in matrimony, we've sensed a sense of displeasure in our elders for what was chosen and decided for them. Why? What wasn't right? Was it that they weren't allowed to make their decisions? Maybe. What if they could make their decisions? Could they answer a simple question: "What do you want?" The answer remains unanswered! Why? Maybe because even today they aren't clear about 'how' they would have gone about making THE MOST IMPORTANT decision. Then what has gone wrong in the tech-cool matrimonial times of today? The choice is ours and there are choices available, then what has gone wrong? We've been known as the 'rational' generation, a race that 'knows' what they want and are the 'smart' ones who can make their decisions. How did we mess up this simplicity? Haven't we 'boasted' about a 'planned' registration on a Matrimonial website? Did we succeed? Give it a thought:
Matrimonial sites are stocked with innumerable registrations and still we are unable to find our match. Match-making or becoming a 'marriage broker', is a booming business today that is definitely generating money, but, providing minimal success rates to the clients/seekers. Why?
Education and technology has enabled us to make this process easy and hassle free, then why are there so many people, who are willing to get married, still living their singleton period? Why is getting married becoming so very complicated? Why are there so many early separations? Why is this blissful communion becoming so volatile to remain united?
Ironically, if anyone fails to answer explicitly any of the questions raised, that person fails to give a clear description about oneself when asked: "Who are YOU?", then how can we expect this person to KNOW how to achieve what they've set out for in their 'willing-to-get-married' journey? The human mind is the most powerful organ and needs careful controlling and handling. If one fails to control his/her mind, one is nothing but a failure! There has to be awareness about SELF, and this is achieved when one chooses to take full control of one's own mind. With this control, there is enough focus inwards and that establishes the road to a magical journey of self-exploration. This is the only exploration that a human requires the most to be aware of one's own self. The one who is a master of one's own mind and is aware of oneself can be an explorer of the gifts of Nature and hence is a Winner. Marriage, too, could become a blissful journey for those who are certain about their wants, needs, desires and requirements.
It really is Simple. Know thyself and thou shalt be an explorer who knows how to make thyself Happier.